I have been working and looking at plots and houses and not much else. Before we came over, I had worked doing the same job for pretty much 11 years and so the comfort zone was entrenched. Apart from moving countries, and all that that entails, changing to a corporate from an entrepeneurial environment has been a huge change. When I was back in SA, I often wondered what day to day life would be / was like in Aus and my view now is that it really depends. It is similar to SA or anywhere else for that matter in the sense that some people work long hours and others not. The biggest difference is the size of the middle class, so whatever job you have, you generally can own a house and car and go overseas on holiday once a year. I seem to remember that the median age of Sydneysiders is under 35 so it is a young city: the fire / smoke alarm inspector looked like a kid out of school and the truck drivers hardly look old enough to have their licence. Up the road from us is Sydney Olympic park where the main stadia are that were used for the 2000 Olympics. We are boring people, but if you are into concerts: e.g. the other night Beyonce was there, Britney Spears is coming, Fleetwood Mac as well as Nickleback, Green Day etc - tons of International acts come here often which we missed in SA. This is truly a world city. I have to commit to get you guys to hold me to it, otherwise I will procrastinate, but I will - or rather I will get my brother, since he is good at photography, to take some photos of the stadium area at night - it is a stunning sight! The lighting is groovy, baby! So that will be our little project for this weekend and we will post on the blog.
We have kind of, sort of, decided that we will most probably live South of Sydney in an area called Bingara Gorge. This is a golf estate which is a relatively new concept here in Australia compared to SA. Not that either of us play golf, but we can try. It is like living in the farmlands which is great to raise kids, not that we have kids but we can keep trying. :-) The place is: http://www.bingaragorge.com.au/llweb/bingaragorge/main.nsf And we were assisted by the saleslady who is an ex Saffer from Benoni!
Ok so much for the land. Well after walking through close on 100 display homes altogether - some a few times, we settled on a design, but are a little bit unsure of the builder. If you want to buy anything in Aus - you can check the supplier out on: http://www.productreview.com.au/ and if you search the builders, almost all have people moaning about them. So yes something similar to SA, and you choose the one who has been least sued, pretty much. Will let you know, but from the time you put pen to paper and the builders handover, it is not like SA - it takes 12 months to build a house here. Sometimes longer.
Other than seeking a habitat, we almost became a cautionary tale. We had been on the lookout for a retirement village for when the folks eventually come over and we almost put their names up on the spot as a certain development looked stunning and the display homes excellent, but my eagle eyed mother in SA noticed something, googled them and discovered that the scheme is under investigation by the Australian securities commission. We had been warned by ex Saffers not to get too blase about crime here, just because it isn't violent. Perhaps we had not been as cautious in our approach as we should have been, so we learned that lesson just in time. In such a regulated society, when you think nothing bad could happen, it easily lulls you. Investors are out $25 million on that scheme so we'll see what the investigation yields. I saw the name Kebbel on the docs, can you believe it! Not sure if there is a connection. Anyway.
And yes, (sigh) still waiting for our container...
Tuesday, 22 September 2009
Monday, 14 September 2009
Hunting
Not Kangaroos but houses.
This past weekend we went househunting - well actually plot and house hunting. We want to have a new house so have decided to buy one of those house and land packages. I thought I would give those interested an idea of prices here: North West of Sydney is the Hills District and there is a place there called 'Homeworld' which is a semi-permanent display of 120 homes by different builders. All the homes are finished and furnished and you can spend the day (or 2) going through all of them. Plots are around 300-400k and the houses similarly priced. A basic house (+-240m2) is listed at say 225k but then once you add the essential things like tiles and carpets, etc. you are up another 100-150k. The land is the most expensive part of the whole exercise is the land. So 650 to 700k gets you a nice house of around 340m2 depending on finishes. If there is a slope on the land, you could be looking at 120k extra, so level plots are essential. Next week we will be looking South of Sydney where land is about 30% cheaper in a similar area and not as crowded. So we'll see. Houses here take about 6-8 months to build. We are leaning towards Eden Brae homes as they have the nicest finishes we've seen. Here are 2 links to give you an idea: http://www.edenbraehomes.com.au/homes/The_Eden_Brae_Series_of_Homes
http://www.avjennings.com.au/NSW/HomesToBuild/SearchResults.aspx
This past weekend we went househunting - well actually plot and house hunting. We want to have a new house so have decided to buy one of those house and land packages. I thought I would give those interested an idea of prices here: North West of Sydney is the Hills District and there is a place there called 'Homeworld' which is a semi-permanent display of 120 homes by different builders. All the homes are finished and furnished and you can spend the day (or 2) going through all of them. Plots are around 300-400k and the houses similarly priced. A basic house (+-240m2) is listed at say 225k but then once you add the essential things like tiles and carpets, etc. you are up another 100-150k. The land is the most expensive part of the whole exercise is the land. So 650 to 700k gets you a nice house of around 340m2 depending on finishes. If there is a slope on the land, you could be looking at 120k extra, so level plots are essential. Next week we will be looking South of Sydney where land is about 30% cheaper in a similar area and not as crowded. So we'll see. Houses here take about 6-8 months to build. We are leaning towards Eden Brae homes as they have the nicest finishes we've seen. Here are 2 links to give you an idea: http://www.edenbraehomes.com.au/homes/The_Eden_Brae_Series_of_Homes
http://www.avjennings.com.au/NSW/HomesToBuild/SearchResults.aspx
Thursday, 10 September 2009
Canberra
I know its been a while. Been busy. My brother and his wife arrived and kept us busy hunting for cars etc. And been working, working, working. I took a 3 day trip down to Canberra this week for work and it was interesting. The trip takes about 3.5 hours and for the last day I drove an additional 3.5 hours to Wagga Wagga (pronounced Wogga Wogga), which is a bit in the middle of nowhere.
I was told that Canberra was a dump by the Sydney guys, but was surprised. It is a manufactured city with its whole economy dependant on the government offices. It is estimated that 2/3 of the people that work there commute from Melbourne or Sydney on a weekly basis. But it is really a pretty place - tons of parks everywhere and the roads are wide, immaculate and fast. Well ok if you were allowed to. Compared to Sydney's horrific roads which are really 4th world, it is a real pleasure. Just a word of advice, do not stay at the Canberra Rex - looks really great on the internet, but... well just don't go there. Trust me on this.
I saw my first kangaroos. Ok so they were dead, but it still counts doesn't it? Let me explain. A freind of mine who lives in Melbourne but works in Canberra says that these kangas are nibbling on the grass in the mornings when he gets to work - sounds idyllic? He says they aren't aggressive and will generally run away if faced with a human. So what's the problem? Well he said he was cycling to work the other morning and a baby kangaroo (locally called a joey) was happily hopping alongside him. At 40km per hour. He warned me to watch out for them. Adult Kangaroos can grow to over 2m and are big buggers. You can't fence them in because, well they clear 2m in a normal jump and at full tilt - somewhere maybe between 50 and 60km/hr they will jump much higher than that. Again, so what? Well they appear not to be too bright. So imagine you are driving along at 110km per hour and a kangaroo doing 60km/hour clears a fence and meets you halfway across a road? Needless to say I drove the whole way down to Wagga scanning either side of the road as far as I could see. So thanks to my buddy Tony scaring the heck out of me, I was a total wreck by the time I reached my destination! There are special whistles you can fit to your car that emit a high pitched sound that they don't like and keeps them away, so I will get some and post a picture soon.
By the way, still waiting for our container - it is here apparently, but been checked by customs... so we wait...
I was told that Canberra was a dump by the Sydney guys, but was surprised. It is a manufactured city with its whole economy dependant on the government offices. It is estimated that 2/3 of the people that work there commute from Melbourne or Sydney on a weekly basis. But it is really a pretty place - tons of parks everywhere and the roads are wide, immaculate and fast. Well ok if you were allowed to. Compared to Sydney's horrific roads which are really 4th world, it is a real pleasure. Just a word of advice, do not stay at the Canberra Rex - looks really great on the internet, but... well just don't go there. Trust me on this.
I saw my first kangaroos. Ok so they were dead, but it still counts doesn't it? Let me explain. A freind of mine who lives in Melbourne but works in Canberra says that these kangas are nibbling on the grass in the mornings when he gets to work - sounds idyllic? He says they aren't aggressive and will generally run away if faced with a human. So what's the problem? Well he said he was cycling to work the other morning and a baby kangaroo (locally called a joey) was happily hopping alongside him. At 40km per hour. He warned me to watch out for them. Adult Kangaroos can grow to over 2m and are big buggers. You can't fence them in because, well they clear 2m in a normal jump and at full tilt - somewhere maybe between 50 and 60km/hr they will jump much higher than that. Again, so what? Well they appear not to be too bright. So imagine you are driving along at 110km per hour and a kangaroo doing 60km/hour clears a fence and meets you halfway across a road? Needless to say I drove the whole way down to Wagga scanning either side of the road as far as I could see. So thanks to my buddy Tony scaring the heck out of me, I was a total wreck by the time I reached my destination! There are special whistles you can fit to your car that emit a high pitched sound that they don't like and keeps them away, so I will get some and post a picture soon.
By the way, still waiting for our container - it is here apparently, but been checked by customs... so we wait...
Wednesday, 2 September 2009
Elizabeth
My brother and his wife arrived on Monday this week to settle here in Aus as well. They are staying with us for a couple of days until their apartment is ready for them to move into. I left home yesterday just after 3am to be onsite for a demo, so things have been busy - hence my tardiness in blogging.
I am starting to recognise streets and some things are even beginning to look vaguely familiar. On Saturday we went to the RTA (Road Traffic Authority) to transfer registration of Carmen's car into her name. You take a number from an electronic dispenser, take a seat and wait in the que until you are called. Elizabeth (not her real name) (well that is what her nametag said , but since she was Chinese, I seriously doubt it) helped us. When we got to the counter, Carmen and I exchanged glances - this appeared to be another Margaret - albeit the Asian derivative. Whilst she typed away busily on her Apple - yes certain government departments have Apples it appears!!! Anyway, as she typed, I asked her where to get the etag that fits on your windscreen and that automatically pays your toll fees. Silence. Type, type, type, Enter. Type, type, type.
She stapled the necessary, handed it over, her face still an impassive blank. I repeated my question.
'Forms at the flont.' she gestured vaguely in the direction of the entrance, her expression deadpan... I momentarily wondered whether she had ever tried her hand at poker and briefly thought of asking her, but thought better of it..
'And then where do we go?' I ventured.
'Then you take number.'
And rejoin the que she forgot to add, i thought to myself - if we end up back at her counter, I swear...
And of course we did.
Type type type, Enter. and then.... the unthinkable happened. She smiled and said 'thank you!' Is smile an exaggeration? I want to say she was almost cheerful - am I going too far, did I imagine it? It was almost as though in that instant she had remembered about some or other motivational customer care course she attended a few years ago in a hotel with red carpets and slightly faded curtains and a loud speaker in a louder tie. Whatever it was, at the end of the day, Margaret retained her title safely.
I am starting to recognise streets and some things are even beginning to look vaguely familiar. On Saturday we went to the RTA (Road Traffic Authority) to transfer registration of Carmen's car into her name. You take a number from an electronic dispenser, take a seat and wait in the que until you are called. Elizabeth (not her real name) (well that is what her nametag said , but since she was Chinese, I seriously doubt it) helped us. When we got to the counter, Carmen and I exchanged glances - this appeared to be another Margaret - albeit the Asian derivative. Whilst she typed away busily on her Apple - yes certain government departments have Apples it appears!!! Anyway, as she typed, I asked her where to get the etag that fits on your windscreen and that automatically pays your toll fees. Silence. Type, type, type, Enter. Type, type, type.
She stapled the necessary, handed it over, her face still an impassive blank. I repeated my question.
'Forms at the flont.' she gestured vaguely in the direction of the entrance, her expression deadpan... I momentarily wondered whether she had ever tried her hand at poker and briefly thought of asking her, but thought better of it..
'And then where do we go?' I ventured.
'Then you take number.'
And rejoin the que she forgot to add, i thought to myself - if we end up back at her counter, I swear...
And of course we did.
Type type type, Enter. and then.... the unthinkable happened. She smiled and said 'thank you!' Is smile an exaggeration? I want to say she was almost cheerful - am I going too far, did I imagine it? It was almost as though in that instant she had remembered about some or other motivational customer care course she attended a few years ago in a hotel with red carpets and slightly faded curtains and a loud speaker in a louder tie. Whatever it was, at the end of the day, Margaret retained her title safely.
Friday, 28 August 2009
Waiting...
Last weekend we took a drive up to the Hills District and saw some very reasonably priced and lovely homes. You have to buy a piece of land seperately of course - but the homes are stunning. They have about 20 fully built showhouses fully furnished so you know exactly what you are in for: www.clarendon.com.au Then during the week I went with a work colleague to vist a council up in the Blue Mountains and we stopped for a bite of lunch and he showed me a view overlooking the valley from echo point - we were up there for business so I never took a camera, but it is truly spectacular!
To say we are looking forward to our container arriving is an understatement! Our butts are calloused and really sore from these hard fold up chairs and the novelty of pumping up our bed every evening is wearing off! Here are some pics of what our flat looks like - the furniture as they would say back in Afrikaans - power! When it finally arrives next month - holding thumbs, as so many others have said, it will be like Christmas in September! Since we started this emigration procedure 18 months ago, the waiting has been a constant companion - and we still suck at being patient with it! No worries - stuff that! Hurry up and get here already!
Wednesday, 26 August 2009
Home
We have been here for 3 weeks in Sydney, but it feels longer. Maybe because we have changed living places 3 times, but SA feels a lifetime away. When I think back on the year and months before our departure, we had so much optimism for life on this side of the pond. I guess we were idealistic and that needs to rightly be brought into line with reality, but there is an old saying: 'Where you go, you will be.' I have been working long hours to try and get a handle on things and a grasp of this market. Everything I do seems to take forever and I long for the comfort of the familiar, because the disorientation one normally feels in leaving a job is compuounded and magnified by emigration. You really start from scratch with no network of people to call on and no safety net in a sense.
I guess that I long for a sense of routine because it creates a context within which and from which one can happily explore. It is not the same as being on holiday where everything new is exciting and wonderful and you can just appreciate it for what it is. The sensory overload here is tiring as you have to begin to find patterns to things - consciously endeavour to make roads and goods familiar so that it becomes a known and given to counter the seemingly insiduous ever -new. Certainly, as much as I love travelling the world and seeing new things and am awed by it -as you may have seen in my earlier blogs, at the end of the trip there is a feeling of belonging and affection and even release when someone says: 'It's time to head home.' Just the word: 'home' conjures images of a fireplace, good food and wine, family and friends laughing and teasing and even just sitting talking nonsense together, a messy mix of random memories! I do know that I am deeply blessed that the word evokes such memories and images as many people have never known that. It is not an easy thing to build a home and I think that more and more I have come to appreciate that like happiness, it is almost always a by-product of a lot of other things. As corny as it sounds, I really look forward to the day when this is not just our permanent chosen place of residence, but truly our home.
I guess that I long for a sense of routine because it creates a context within which and from which one can happily explore. It is not the same as being on holiday where everything new is exciting and wonderful and you can just appreciate it for what it is. The sensory overload here is tiring as you have to begin to find patterns to things - consciously endeavour to make roads and goods familiar so that it becomes a known and given to counter the seemingly insiduous ever -new. Certainly, as much as I love travelling the world and seeing new things and am awed by it -as you may have seen in my earlier blogs, at the end of the trip there is a feeling of belonging and affection and even release when someone says: 'It's time to head home.' Just the word: 'home' conjures images of a fireplace, good food and wine, family and friends laughing and teasing and even just sitting talking nonsense together, a messy mix of random memories! I do know that I am deeply blessed that the word evokes such memories and images as many people have never known that. It is not an easy thing to build a home and I think that more and more I have come to appreciate that like happiness, it is almost always a by-product of a lot of other things. As corny as it sounds, I really look forward to the day when this is not just our permanent chosen place of residence, but truly our home.
Saturday, 22 August 2009
Not a bear
I haven't had a chance to google this, but apparently our Aussie buddies from Sydney's Northern Beaches insist that a Koala is in fact not a bear, but a Koala. Well, ok if they say so.. We have named our Koala that they gave us on arrival, Kobie Koala, to reflect his heritage as well as that of his parents. And here he is with a piece of chocolate fugde cake type thing that Carmen bought today and that miraculously has survived all of 3 hours. I am not betting it will see tomorrow morning though...
Car for Car men
Today we made an offer on a car for Carmen at a Toyota dealership. It is an odd thing here that even if somebody has registration papers, the car could still be stolen or under finance or whatever and can be repossessed. So buying from a dealership is your safest bet. SA's system is better in that the bank retains the reg docs until the car is fully paid up. Anyway, the test drive was a little different. The first thing you notice when you walk onto the lot is that all the car doors are unlocked. Test drive?
'No problem', says the salesman - here are the keys. And he turns around and heads back inside the dealership - I'll be at my desk when you get back.'
'Err, you aren't going to come with us...?'
'No,why?'
'O Ok.'
So off we went. Just a run of the mill 2008 Toyota Corolla 1.8 Auto with low k's so I think we have a deal.
Dealer: 'So you guys starting out here?'
'Yes, hoping to make Aus our home.'
'Ok tell you what, at no charge, I'll throw in an extra 3 year warranty on top of the manufacturers warranty on the car so you are covered for a total of 5 years and you can relax and get settled here - one less thing to worry about, ok?'
'Er, ok thanks!'
Then they called over the service manager - this is who will be looking after you etc. and it wasn't even a new car. Anyway, they all made us feel very welcome. But boy their interest rates are high if you wanted to finance a vehicle. A friend recommended that we finance part of the vehicle and not buy it cash as it helps to build a credit record for when you buy a house, but though the prime is at around 5% or so, rates begin for corporate deals at 9%! and vary all the way up to 17%! So whilst the prime interest rate in SA is higher, your actual rate there may in fact be lower than here! Weird. Also even if they promise you lower rates - like some advertise 2.99%, they hide the real charges in monthly admin fees or whatever. So your payments may in fact be the same - very sneaky little buggers!
Another happy experience of Aussie service: Earlier in the week I had booked a time slot for today with a mobile tinting company to come and tint my car windows darker, because, as I am on the road, my vehicle is kitted out with an inverter that powers all my electrical gadgets,a phone kit, hard drive, GPS and car desk mount for my laptop and with the darker tint,I wouldn't have to remove my laptop from the desk all the time as it wouldn't be a temptation for an opportunist thief. Anyway, the guy rocks up as arranged, takes one look at my car and says: you have the darkest legal tint allowed, so I can do it, but you will get a fine if you get stopped. So on his advice, I decided against it. I offered to pay the call out fee as I should have checked on the level of tinting but he refused in typical Aussie fashion: No, no worries, mate.I wasn't too far away anyway.'
O and we finally visited a wonderful guy shop today called 'Bunnings'. Like Builders warehouse, but rougher and twice as many tools! They have like 50 different types of work gloves! I needed some safety gear for work, but we also decided to get a Dustbuster - those rechargeable little hand held vacuums as our proper vacuum in the container only arrives in a week or 2 and we couldn't face sweeping / brushing the carpets of our flat manually all the time. This is going to be a real test of the little unit - we'll see if it lasts the 2 weeks...
Tomorrow we may be spoiling ourselves and going to movies: $16.00 each and if you want the fancy chairs: $33.00 per ticket on Saturdays and Sundays! Missing our cheap Vitality R14 movies big time! Cheers for now!
'No problem', says the salesman - here are the keys. And he turns around and heads back inside the dealership - I'll be at my desk when you get back.'
'Err, you aren't going to come with us...?'
'No,why?'
'O Ok.'
So off we went. Just a run of the mill 2008 Toyota Corolla 1.8 Auto with low k's so I think we have a deal.
Dealer: 'So you guys starting out here?'
'Yes, hoping to make Aus our home.'
'Ok tell you what, at no charge, I'll throw in an extra 3 year warranty on top of the manufacturers warranty on the car so you are covered for a total of 5 years and you can relax and get settled here - one less thing to worry about, ok?'
'Er, ok thanks!'
Then they called over the service manager - this is who will be looking after you etc. and it wasn't even a new car. Anyway, they all made us feel very welcome. But boy their interest rates are high if you wanted to finance a vehicle. A friend recommended that we finance part of the vehicle and not buy it cash as it helps to build a credit record for when you buy a house, but though the prime is at around 5% or so, rates begin for corporate deals at 9%! and vary all the way up to 17%! So whilst the prime interest rate in SA is higher, your actual rate there may in fact be lower than here! Weird. Also even if they promise you lower rates - like some advertise 2.99%, they hide the real charges in monthly admin fees or whatever. So your payments may in fact be the same - very sneaky little buggers!
Another happy experience of Aussie service: Earlier in the week I had booked a time slot for today with a mobile tinting company to come and tint my car windows darker, because, as I am on the road, my vehicle is kitted out with an inverter that powers all my electrical gadgets,a phone kit, hard drive, GPS and car desk mount for my laptop and with the darker tint,I wouldn't have to remove my laptop from the desk all the time as it wouldn't be a temptation for an opportunist thief. Anyway, the guy rocks up as arranged, takes one look at my car and says: you have the darkest legal tint allowed, so I can do it, but you will get a fine if you get stopped. So on his advice, I decided against it. I offered to pay the call out fee as I should have checked on the level of tinting but he refused in typical Aussie fashion: No, no worries, mate.I wasn't too far away anyway.'
O and we finally visited a wonderful guy shop today called 'Bunnings'. Like Builders warehouse, but rougher and twice as many tools! They have like 50 different types of work gloves! I needed some safety gear for work, but we also decided to get a Dustbuster - those rechargeable little hand held vacuums as our proper vacuum in the container only arrives in a week or 2 and we couldn't face sweeping / brushing the carpets of our flat manually all the time. This is going to be a real test of the little unit - we'll see if it lasts the 2 weeks...
Tomorrow we may be spoiling ourselves and going to movies: $16.00 each and if you want the fancy chairs: $33.00 per ticket on Saturdays and Sundays! Missing our cheap Vitality R14 movies big time! Cheers for now!
Thursday, 20 August 2009
In SA we would call it a bit of a k*k day...
Today the honeymoon feeling was punctured somewhat. I guess I missed family and friends, my parish community and had an 'off' day at work. I suppose that reality would inevitably bite, and day to day routine take over, but I thought it would take longer. I miss my family and friends and perhaps the familiarity of knowing where everything is, while at the same time, I am glad to have been given a chance to start a new adventure. Australia is a country of great physical beauty, much like Cape Town and Knysna - without the litter, crime and beggars. Funny enough, I saw a young student being booked by a traffic officer at the traffic lights here in Sydney for trying to clean people's windscreens. My Australian companion remarked: 'Shame she is only trying to pay for uni", until I took him 5 or 10 years down the line if they allowed that and stopping at traffic lights becomes the running of a gauntlet. Though I am certainly enjoying the many freedoms that physical security gives you here, there are also some freedoms that are missing here and that SA had, although they were also beginning to fade - freedom of expression would be one: it is difficult to have the robust debates that one could have in SA without offending, as all speech is sanitised and you have to be very careful not to offend. Sure it makes for politeness and great courteousness, but it also means that society in general doesn't share on issues of the heart - be they politics, religion or whatever, and so, sharing superficially, except for those most close to you, means that in the main, wider society appears shallow and soulless. Australia is not perfect - it has never claimed to be and I guess I also want those reading here to know that I am not blind to her faults. But on the balance, I still choose it, as the right to life of every human being, necessarily underlies all other rights of our shared humanity. At least even if this country does not respect that right to life with regards to the unborn, unlike SA, it at least does so with regards to those ex utero.
Wednesday, 19 August 2009
Day number...and where the heck am I?
I am losing track of the days... Any new job is disorientating, I guess, but moving countries and doing it doubly so. I suppose at least they speak a variation of English here, which makes it somewhat easier. I asked the other day for a koki and was met with a blank stare. So basically if I'm not sure what things are called, I read the label of the item concerned. 'Permanent marker' therefore produced an instant and helpful response.
I just have to vent about the traffic here and more specifically my Garmin GPS.
I have been fighting the whole week with my blasted GPS. It is not that it is faulty. It does things just to cheese me off. It works a treat when it works and I especially bought a fancy one with bluetooth and traffic reports and the only thing that makes me restrain myself from dropping it in acid and hammering it repeatedly with my car jack is the fact that I believe I would get lost more often than it does. But it has been a close call sometimes ... The skyscrapers in the city sometimes make it disorientated and it has taken me around in circles more than once. I can deal with that: I normally look for the Harbour Bridge as I would have used Table Mountain as a reference point and it somehow comforts me and - more often than not - the Garmin as well, and then it is able to lead me the rest of the way home. The problem is when it is been bloody vindictive. I will be cruising happily along, settling into the rhythm of the traffic of my new home city roads and then out of the blue the little cretin on the dashboard will say in the sweetest female British voice: 'Take the next exit' - completely ignorant or more likely, unconcerned that I have to negotiate 4 lanes of traffic to get there. And then.... as I near the top of the offramp and am faced with choosing a lane going left or right, she will be silent. Dead silent. I can scream at her and threaten to rip out her innards; I can slow down to a crawl and watch old couples in walkers pass me on the pavement, as I wait for her to say something but it doesn't help. Until I am finally forced to choose a lane and commit to it and turn right, immediately after which point, she announces decisively: 'Turn left' - I swear there is a note of sadistic pleasure in the voice sometimes. The she will say: 'recalculating' and feign myriad calculations to find another route and proceed to tease me for half a dozen blocks announcing that I turn left or right on such and such a street just after I have passed each successive street. I have stopped shouting and swearing at the GPS, because my apoplectic shouting and gesticulations at the stupid device were attracting attention from other motorists. The damn thing is taking years off of my life. Anyway, I am thinking of nicknaming her Margaret...
I just have to vent about the traffic here and more specifically my Garmin GPS.
I have been fighting the whole week with my blasted GPS. It is not that it is faulty. It does things just to cheese me off. It works a treat when it works and I especially bought a fancy one with bluetooth and traffic reports and the only thing that makes me restrain myself from dropping it in acid and hammering it repeatedly with my car jack is the fact that I believe I would get lost more often than it does. But it has been a close call sometimes ... The skyscrapers in the city sometimes make it disorientated and it has taken me around in circles more than once. I can deal with that: I normally look for the Harbour Bridge as I would have used Table Mountain as a reference point and it somehow comforts me and - more often than not - the Garmin as well, and then it is able to lead me the rest of the way home. The problem is when it is been bloody vindictive. I will be cruising happily along, settling into the rhythm of the traffic of my new home city roads and then out of the blue the little cretin on the dashboard will say in the sweetest female British voice: 'Take the next exit' - completely ignorant or more likely, unconcerned that I have to negotiate 4 lanes of traffic to get there. And then.... as I near the top of the offramp and am faced with choosing a lane going left or right, she will be silent. Dead silent. I can scream at her and threaten to rip out her innards; I can slow down to a crawl and watch old couples in walkers pass me on the pavement, as I wait for her to say something but it doesn't help. Until I am finally forced to choose a lane and commit to it and turn right, immediately after which point, she announces decisively: 'Turn left' - I swear there is a note of sadistic pleasure in the voice sometimes. The she will say: 'recalculating' and feign myriad calculations to find another route and proceed to tease me for half a dozen blocks announcing that I turn left or right on such and such a street just after I have passed each successive street. I have stopped shouting and swearing at the GPS, because my apoplectic shouting and gesticulations at the stupid device were attracting attention from other motorists. The damn thing is taking years off of my life. Anyway, I am thinking of nicknaming her Margaret...
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